London Leisures
Day 1 (Saturday, April 11th): My Emerald City
Wh-hooooo. London is fun.
There's English! And cool phone booths! And clean underground rail stations!
I woke up this morning early to map out my day. Loren was kind enough to leave behind an Oyster card for me--for people who don't know (including me until like two weeks ago), an Oyster is what you call the subway card for London. That way London is my Oyster. Haha. Wow. That was bad. Anyway...
I had everything planned out, but then a text message from my mom came back to me: "Are you going to see Wicked?" I hadn't even known Wicked in London; I am a bad theater geek. So I looked online out of mere curiosity.
Whoa. There were still tickets for sale. That is unheard of on Broadway. So I couldn't resist that opportunity, could I? Besides, I wouldn't be spending money on any Wicked merchandise or souvenirs because I already own basically everything.
So I was heading to a matinee show for Wicked. Yay! Then panic set in... What about my day? As I gulped down my Earl Grey tea without sugar (I'm not going to complain about no sugar when I have my own bed, no way), I came up with a new plan, and so today began with the Tower of London.
This is going to sound ridiculous, but I had my first bowl of cereal since January in London, and that was a great way to start off my morning. :)
Now, years ago--eight, actually (ugh, really?)--my mother and father surprised me for Christmas with a trip to London. We were leaving right after Christmas, and we spent about a week in January in London. We stayed at a hotel called the Chesterfield Mayfair. That was my first experience with rooms in Europe: the roll-away bed for me was pushed right up against the queen sized bed my parents had.
We had an amazing trip, but there were several things we missed out on. For instance, we spent one of our last days up at a place called Warwick Castle, and by the time we got back that evening, the Tower of London had closed. So we missed seeing the ghost of Anne Boleyn, tragically.
But I got to make up for that! I went as the ambassador for the family. Once again, it's a pain to say, "My adopted mother's mother's family is distantly related to Anne Boleyn," so I'm just going to say she's MY distant ancestor. I don't want to hear anything about it! It's just semantics.
Even though it was raining on my way to the Metro, the sun had come out, and the flowers were absolutely gorgeous.
Plus when the rain is passing, the clouds look so damn cool.
Screw you, Henry, for killing my ancestor! :O
Abstract art that attempts to make Henry not look like an ugly asshole.
!!!!!!!
Finally!
I had ordered the ticket online, following Jamie's and Loren's advice. It was so nice to bypass the line, especially as people looked at me as if to say um-the-line-starts-back-there-obnoxious-tourist. I also paid for an audio guide because I wasn't sure how furnished or informational it would be inside.
Bypassing the line like a boss.
I totally remember this walkway. That was weird.
Interesting visual juxtaposition.
The White Tower
Wow. The Tower was incredible. If I lived here, I would've spent the whole day exploring. Thank goodness I have had months in Paris. I would be so stressed if I could only run through the Louvre in a few hours. Luckily, I was really only interested in the Anne Boleyn stuff.
There were five tours to choose from, and so I naturally chose the "Prisoners' Tour." It started by this glass sculpture-disk-thing, which serves as a memorial (?) for all those beheaded. Anne Boleyn is on there, of course, as is another one of Henry's wives. (I don't know much about the others. We're very family-centric.) The tour talked a lot about Anne Boleyn, but it also talked a lot about Lady Jane Grey. Now, all I know is an iTunes trailer I watched for the movie version of Lady Jane Grey's life, but the story still matched: sixteen-year-old girl is pushed to the throne by her power-hungry father and family, she's overthrown after nine days, she watches her husband get beheaded and dragged by her cell headless (ew), and then she dies via head-chopping herself.
Well, Anne, you can take comfort in the fact that part of your family is still going strong in a small town in Connecticut.
There's not much to say about this house except it's where Anne Boleyn probably spent her days--both before she was crowned queen AND before she was executed. That's...unsettling. Anyway, it's one of the oldest--if not THE oldest--houses in England, hence the man standing guard and the lack of photos of the inside, since no one is allowed in.
The following pictures are from the Beauchamp Tower, which is where Lady Jane Grey was allegedly held. There is graffiti from other prisoners on the walls. And it turns out, even after the head-chopping days were long over, the government still held prisoners there--like Nazis. Seriously.
Shakespeare takes historical liberties and outright blames Richard III for having them murdered. In fact, the tour even featured a clip of Sir Laurence Olivier playing Richard III in the movie based on the play. (Here's a scene. Now, I couldn't find the scene they had playing in the Tower, but yeah, I forgot that one of my favorite books, The Winter of Our Discontent by John Steinbeck, draws its title from a line from Shakespeare's Richard III. Actually, though, pretty much every title is some sort of literary allusion to someone else's work.)
We can basically assumed there were killed somewhere in the tower because workers hundreds of years later discovered two small skeletons in a wooden chest. Yuck. This is why it would be terrible to be a construction worker in an old city, especially one like London where bodies would hang from bridges.
This--technically called a portcullis--is what holds the "Traitor's Gate" from beginning part of the Tower up.
So the Bloody Tower isn't really macabre. I mean, this is where Sir Walter Raleigh was held, and so they made a reconstruction of his room. For a prisoner he seemed to have been doing pretty well, considering I think he had a child during his stay here and even wrote a book. Maybe being trapped in a prison, though, is conducive to concentrating on your work.
Animation short that attempts to show us what happened to the princes, even though we don't know. Though actually...
Yeah, this is what I was referring to before. But actually, they were only last seen alive here, so the "bloody" in the name seems to be a misnomer. Besides, if they really were smothered as Shakespeare implies, I don't see how "bloody" makes sense even then.
The two photos above are views from the walkway leading you out of the Bloody Tower. If there is something in more abundance than towers here, it's walkways. There are freaking everywhere.
After that informative tour, I went through the Torture Equipment Room (it wasn't very exciting) and then decided what the hell and saw the crown jewels. The line, of course, was longer for the crown jewels than any of the other tours combined. And no photos were allowed, so sorry, Mom, you can't ogle the jewels.
Really, it's ridiculous how long the line was. And as you can see from the photo on the left, this is relatively short compared to what I'm assuming it looks like in the summer.
I will compare seeing the Crown Jewels to seeing the Great Hope Diamond: cool but still underwhelming. Maybe if we got to try them on...
Not related to jewels, but this was adorable.
I enjoyed seeing them, but my jaw was on the floor the entire time, mostly because the amount of money and lavish adornment was so obscene to me. It's just like how I feel about Versailles. It's quite hard for me to enjoy when I imagine one royal family living in this "hunting lodge," and I feel the same when imagining these things being brought out every few decades or so for coronations or baptisms or whatever. They had a whole row of gold maces. A mace seems kind of useless when it's made out of gold. Also, one of the King Charleses had four freaking gold maces. One is bad enough, but four? How many maces does one man need?
The tour went on and on about how some of the diamonds set in the crowns came from this thousands-of-karats diamond discovered in South Africa. It was fascinating the first time and a little wearying after the fourth time.
I thought about buying crowns for my parents, but then I received this text from my dad:
I don't think his ego needs any more inflating.
Here are some more #garywillardtexts gems (yes, I made a hashtag for him). "Why is she being so mean to her father?" you're all saying. Well, that's what children do! He should be used to it by now.
Left: Dad not understanding how group messages work. Right: Dad trying to be funny (hopefully).
I sought out Anne Boleyn souvenirs and found this gem:
Here's a zoomed-in version:
Yep, that's me with a mini Anne Boleyn doll. They had all six wives of Henry VIII, but that set was 45 pounds, and we don't care about any of the other wives. Heh heh.
I want to go! :(
Loved the people in period costumes. Especially when they weren't lecturing, they were still walking around in character. Dedication.
Well, I had to get some pictures of Tower Bridge, right?
After that, I decided I had to book it to the Apollo Victoria Theatre, where Wicked was playing. I hailed a cab on Tower Bridge after taking some life-threatening pictures. The cab ride was stupidly expensive, but the information I gleaned from the driver was delightful. He pointed out all these sights along the drive. At one point, he said, "I know you're probably not interested, as these are all useless facts." I proudly proclaimed myself as an expert in useless facts as well. We drove past St. James's park, and he said the tulips had only just come out. We also drove past Buckingham Palace, which I admittedly think is really overrated, as well as St. Paul's Cathedral. The driver said St. Paul's cost money to go inside, but on Sundays it's free for "worship," so that's when people like me flock to it.
An improvement since eight years ago: now my camera can take pictures from the taxi without blurring all the images. So I snapped some shots as he talked. This is part of London's financial district, hence the smaller number of people.
Surprisingly, this is a courthouse, though it looks like a church, I observed. The cab driver said it's all the rage for rich couples getting divorced to settle here. It's quite fashionable. Strange, since it looks more appropriate to get married in.
Well, if there's a picture of a cat, I'm going to take it!
Trafalgar looks much nicer with the sun.
Riding by St. James's Park.
Quickly passing Buckingham. It wasn't on my to-do list because I saw it with my parents. Also, I found it extremely boring. Kind of like the White House. What fun is a place if you can only look at it? I'm that person who likes climbing on fences, and that's just a big no-no when it comes to presidents' and queens' houses.
The two pictures above? I actually remember these sights from our first London Cab Tour. Also eerie.
The driver was very impressed that I actually was prepared to get to the show on time. He says tons of people--not even tourists, but actual London inhabitants--think they can get from one side of London to the other in 10 minutes to make a show. Um, no. Anyway, the photos above are of the theater next to the Apollo Victoria Theatre where Wicked is playing: that is the Victoria Palace Theatre. He said it is much better-looking than the Apollo Victoria, which I have to agree. Even with the construction in the background, you can't beat that dome. Oh, and of course, Billy Elliot is playing here.
(ACG: When I looked up "theaters near apollo victoria london" because I couldn't remember the Victoria Palace Theatre's name, another theater popped up, and it's called the Harold Pinter Theatre! Given that I've read Harold Pinter in Dramatic Writing and Ian McKellen and Patrick Stewart recently did a Harold Pinter play called No Man's Land in 2013, that was really cool.)
Now, the show... I've seen Wicked before--a lot, which has led certain people to call me spoiled :P--but I still loved it. I especially liked this production. I've always thought British people sound "American"--or at least how I'm used to hearing singing, anyway--when they sing, but Glinda and Elphaba sounded very, very British. It was kind of funny, especially when they talked about farm girls and such.
Thankfully, asinine things audiences do like singing and making dumb comments--"Oh, so she's the Wicked Witch of the West" (no shit, Sherlock, because the green skin wasn't enough to give it away I guess)--is kept to a minimum in London. The Brits are classy like that. Even the children were well-behaved. Or maybe I just find them more charming because even when they ask to use the bathroom--"Mummy, where is the loo?"--it sounds so grown-up and adorable at the same time.
Audiences in London can be tough crowds, as I recall from when my family went to see Les Miz in West End. The production was absolutely phenomenal--one of the best I've seen, ever--and yet we were the only ones standing at the end. That's when we also discovered that British people are very discerning about what "good" theater is. Now, I agree that we stand sometimes when we shouldn't--which in turn diminishes when a musical is wonderful and deserves immediate praise--but it just seemed like their standards were too damn high.
Luckily, Wicked is a family and non-pretentious-theater-goers show, so they were more enthused here.
Wow. This is pretty damn long. I'll recount my London Eye adventure in another post--as well as my first delicious dinner in England FINALLY!
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